Sitting here with a cuppa (lactofree milk, no sugar) and just pondering about life.
A few years ago, I could count on one hand the things i’d do in a year. Not living, just surviving. Easily wasting my life away, on bad thoughts, low self esteem, silly boys (none of them ‘men’) and getting drunk at weekends.
To me that feels like a million years ago.
I feel like meeting my boyfriend opened up my life to colour and to life itself. I’m content. I can sit and daydream about our future with a huge smug smile rather than fretting and doubting everything.
Overcoming your demons isn’t easy. I struggle, even now, and it’s exhausting. But beating your episode is empowering. Each time it gets that little bit more easier.
In the past couple of years, I have sat in a Spitfire, did a Taxy in a Lancaster Bomber, fed penguins, been to numerous weddings, been away, so many gigs, took up golf (which i’m surprisingly good at), taken up photography, pushed my painting skills to the next level – all i’m incredibly proud of!
I still struggle to fully let go and enjoy the moment, but i’m getting there. The biggest thing for me is to believe in a future, which i never used to do. It’s a comforting and warm feeling. I’m excited for it! It’s going to be amazing.
Best crack on with my day now!